Study: MOONLIGHT 15X MORE CANCEROUS THAN SUNLIGHT

Lycanthropy remains disputed

8 November, 2007 (Boulder, CO): A new study by the University of Colorado's Center for Astrophysics and Space Astronomy (CASA) has found that moonlight poses a greater threat than sunlight but that the threat is diminished due to the moon's small size. According to the recent report, Your Moon and You: What You Didn't Know About the Moon, exposure to direct moon light greatly increases the risk of developing basal cell carcinoma (BCC), the most common form of skin cancer. However, the report also stated that the moon poses no threat due to it's small size, weak light and regular phases. Astronomer and moon-enthusiast Dr. Lon Endore summarized the findings by stating that the moon was the "daddy-long-legs of space." When asked to clarify, Dr. Endore said,"the daddy-long-legs has enough poison to kill you, but has fangs too small to deliver the poison, so too does the moon have enough energy to kill you, but sadly cannot."
Critics were quick to point out flaws in the study; namely, that moon the produces no light of its own. In an interview with NPR, Dr. Guy Cheney of CASA responded, "of course we know the moon makes no light, but it's like skiing bro. You get a worse sunburn from the snow than the sun, the moon is like the snow. Why do you think the Apollo astronauts wore those big suits?" Critics have yet to respond.