Saturday, January 21, 2006


20 January, 2006 (Arlington, Texas): After hitting a roadblock in negotiations with the city of Arlington over a new stadium, Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones has struck a deal to move America's Team to the tiny Texas town of Pecos in the heart of the West Texas badlands. Jones cited remarkably cheap property and ample sunshine as the major incentives for the move.
Sources close to Jones have denied rumors that the eccentric owner has recently lost the use of his leg and has succumbed to madness after contracting gangrene while on a hunting trip last fall.
While those in the Cowboy's front office remain confident that their fearless leader has not lost his mind, a Cowboys spokesperson assured the Dallas press that the move had yet to be finalized and that Jones, despite all outward appearances, is in perfect mental health.

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