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MONSTER ISLAND BANNED FROM WORLD BASEBALL CLASSIC
Worshipping Natives Outraged

21 January, 2006 (Tokyo, Japan): Despite initial opposition, the U.S. Treasury Department issued a license Friday allowing the communist, island nation of Cuba to participate in the World Baseball Classic. However, another island nation with a bad reputation will be watching the spring tournament from home. After joint opposition from Japan and the United States, Monster Island - mythical, radiated home to such monsters as Mothra and Godzilla - will not be invited to compete.
In a taped response, Monster Island spokesmonster, King Ghidra, was quoted as saying, "The US is afraid to take on our team. George Bush and [Japanese Prime Minister] Junichiro Koizumi are the real atomic monsters here."
The ban comes just weeks after Mothra, the Monster Island right fielder, was released from a AAA team in Oregon for testing positive for MGH, Monster Growth Hormone.
Godzilla could not be reached for comment.